I was never going to be super mom but I decided I could be a better mom #parenting
By Jennell Dukovac, CanadianMomEh.com
I grew up in an average American family. I’m American born, married a Canadian and we live in the great white north, and I am loving it! Both my parents worked and I have a brother and a sister. For some reason, the domestic life was just not for me. I vowed at a young age that I was never going to get married. Naturally as things go, I now find myself married with four kids and no domestic skills to fall back on.
I know. What was I thinking? I was used to eating out or eating out of a box. When I got married we went out to eat a lot, I mean a lot. If we could, we would go out for breakfast, lunch and dinner. I did have this one special chicken dish that I made on special occasions. I never even changed the recipe, EVER. My hubby said he liked it (lucky for him!) My mother never taught me to cook, not because she couldn’t or wouldn’t, I was just not interested in that sort of thing.
I can be a messy person. There, I said it. I didn’t learn how to clean or take care of my things when I was younger. My parents tried to teach me, oh believe me, they tried but I just wasn’t interested. I dreamt of one day having housekeepers to clean up after me. Four kids later…I’m still dreaming.
We decided early in our relationship even before we were married that I would stay home with the children. I realized after we had children that there was a lot more to this than I thought. I not only was responsible for myself but for my family as well. I woke up one day and decided I was going to change. I needed to change for the benefit of me and my children (maybe, my husband too). I knew I was never going to be super mom but I decided I could be a better mom. So I set off to learn how to be organized, how to cook, how to clean, and how to be more frugal. I am not close to being perfect, but I’m striving for being better.
Over the next few weeks I would like to share with all of you what I learned from my adventure. Being a mom of four, I realized it is impractical to go out to eat with everyone, it adds up quickly and is not always the healthiest of choices. I have also learnt that kids can be messy and it can get out of hand quickly. No matter who you are or how much you make, I believe everyone can benefit from tips on how to be healthier and save money.
Here I am, I find myself married with four kids, trying to make our house a home. This is my journey. I will share things that I learn along the way. Oh, and no more boxed dinner for me. My kids wouldn’t eat it anyway.
About the Author:
Jennell is a mom of four who loves to read, bake bread and watch crime dramas when she has the time. She is active in her church and has worked with youth groups for many years. She loves spending time with her family, playing games and reading together. Her current passion is learning how to make her house a home.
I knew before I ever got pregnant that I was not going cook like Rachael Ray or be crafty like Martha Stewart, but I do the best I can and my kids seem to be turning out ok.
I think the important thing is that your kids know you love them. After that…it’s all bonus from there 🙂
My mom was pretty handy. She grew up on a farm and learned how to take care of her own food. She also learned a lot of repair and DIY stuff from her father. She passed the cooking gene on to me. Some DIY things I can handle but the rest I would rather someone else take care of it. I never thought about marriage and kids when I was younger. It wasn’t really something I was interested in. I wanted to go to college and travel the world.
I have never liked cooking, it’s a daily struggle to figure out what to make for my family of 3 every night. So, we do eat out about twice a week 🙁
I think that you are a great mom for wanting to do what you can for your kids. You may not be a perfect mom but you are the perfect mom for them.
Good for you! As a parent I think it is so important to teach our girls, girls and boys,, the importance of a clean and organized space and the concept of cooking. These are life skills that are so important to have as young adults so we can be prepared for when we have a family.
Sadly my parents divorced when I was 15. My mom from that age told me one thing and that was NEVER to depend on anyone. Make sure I could support myself if it ever was to happen I needed to be prepared. I started to take classes in school like auto shope, constructions and wood shop. I may have taken it to an extreme as poor hubby doesn’t get to be very handy lol. Congrats on making the change that best fit your family.
I think that these life skills are important for every child to learn. It is the only way that they will truly become independent.
Looks like all the kids are happy and that is all that matters being super mom is definitely not required. I am hoping that my son will look back on his childhood and say that it was a good one and that he felt loved and wanted.
I learned all of the skills when I was growing up and I am glad I did. But honestly, I do not like to cook. Let me clean any day. I do keep a real clean, organized house.
I’d say I’m the opposite. I love to cook and clean but I’m not always tidy. We all have our plus and minuses 🙂
I am not the best cook but I try my best my hubs is the best lol.I try to teach my kids everything I can so that they know how to do everything and will not rely on anyone but themselves.Still I do not think anyone is perfect and no one needs to be.
My parents have always been amazing – I’ve put them through so much as well so I am very lucky x
I’m not an amazing cook either. I like to try new things, but sometimes I think we still eat out way too often.
It took me a good 5 years before I started trying to cook new things, but now I am willing.
There is no one way to parent, we all do the best we can with what we know at the time. It’s good you want to improve on yourself. We are always growing (or should be).
Sounds a lot like me. I did always want to be a mom, and I think I’m good at the important stuff. I’ll never be June Cleaver, though. I can’t cook well and while I clean enough so that things aren’t gross, I’ll never pass a white-glove inspection. Good luck with your journey!
Please don’t come with a white glove, lol!
I love that outlook of that too. Who could really be supermom ?none of us LOL.
Don’t feel bad I think alot of people these days are the same boat. Good luck to you on this new adventure of cooking and cleaning. ,
I am a Canadian born from Toronto Ontario Canada and married an American and we live in Michigan. I often make post of my failed attempts and say I’m not martha lol too funny. nice to meet you.
You have a beautiful family. Guess what I can be messy at times too. Well rather the kids can be messy and I refuse to clean up after them at times. Being a better mom is all we can dream for and you’re a great one!
I tried really hard with my first child to be super mom but then realized that it was more important to enjoy life and what little time I had with her. So what if the dishes sit there for a little bit and the laundry isn’t folded? It will be there later but that family time won’t last forever.
We can always be better and work to improve ourselves. Great family you have.
I’m definitely on the messy category sometimes. It’s more like clutter, I would say and papers!
As a mom of four myself, this post really resonated with me. Thank you for sharing your heart. I’m looking forward to reading so much more from you.
Being super mom is totally overrated! If you’re doing the best you can & everyone is happy, that’s all that matters. 🙂